NEW YEAR, NEW RESOLUTION !!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011 !!! 

Another year gone by and before we realize it, it’s already 2011. Have you made your resolution for new year?

Most people usually make a new resolution for New Year, a promise to self to change something in our life. But unfortunately in the course of the year, we tend to ‘neglect’ or even completely forget the resolution that we made. So now I want to share on how I make resolutions for new year and how to keep and fulfill that resolution until the end of the year. I hope this will be useful for you too. :)

First of all, I always make a specific and clear resolution, like for example : I want to stop my drinking habit completely. Because for me obscure resolution, like : I want to be a better person next year, is too broad and too confusing. With resolution like that, I will have a hard time to find where I should begin with to make myself a better person and how’s that exactly better mean anyway, in financial or family or what, and in the end it will make me lose my spirit or forget to fulfill my resolution. Compared to specific resolution like the first example. With that kind of resolution I know what I need to do and how I’m going to do it.

Second, I always make a down to earth resolution. I personally don’t like to make a resolution that is unreachable, like : I will have 1 billion dollar by the end of year. It’s true nothing is impossible, but what are the chances for me to be able to fulfill it? Very very small. What’s the point then? Sometimes for me some things that are too big are not always good, and one of those goes for resolution. Why don’t I keep with something simple, yet meaningful and reachable, so when the year’s end I can look back and say I fulfilled my resolution.

Third, I always decide what I want or wish to change by thinking back what was the thing that struck me the most or the most memorable thing in this year. Why it should be the thing that struck me the most? Well, there are several reasons. The first reason is because the important part is I don’t want to forget my resolution, if I forget it then how the heck I’m going to fulfill it, and by making resolution based on that I will be able to remember my resolution all year long. I know for sure I will not easily forget the things what struck me the most, I will be remember it for a long time. So whenever I remembered about that thing, my resolution will also pop up in my head at the same time, so it’s kind like of constant reminder, this way I can always remember the resolution I made until the end of year. The second reason is because it will give me additional motivation and reason to fulfill my resolution. For me personally, if a thing that was really struck me (especially in a bad way) then I will try as hard and as much as I can to change it because I don’t want that thing ever happen to me again.

The last, I always relate and tell my resolution to people that I love or close to me, like my family and friends. By relating my resolution to them, it gives me a huge motivation and reason to fulfill my resolution, because with this I think I don’t fulfill this resolution just for my personal accomplishment but rather for their sake too. Whenever I see them, I will remember my resolution. And by telling them my resolution, they can remind me if I still forget my resolution unconsciously somehow or if I stray from my way.

Well, I hope this article can help you.;D

So what is your resolution for this year? Share it in the comments box below. :D

Please add me on Facebook and Twitter from the bar on the right > > >

And as usual, don’t hesitate to e-mail me at sleepingwiseman@yahoo.com if you have problems or questions. ;)

Best Regards,

Sleeping Wiseman

Everything Happens for a Reason

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! 

  

A savior was born today to save us from eternal death!!! (sorry for the late post, I have connection problem)

Several days ago, my friends sent me this story.

There are 2 people on a travel together. They have a donkey to carry their stuff, a torch to light up their way at night, and a chicken, friend of the donkey. One of the two people is a very good person that believes in God and the other is atheist. Along the way, they talked about God. “God is good.” The believer said. “Let us see if you’re right about that in our travel.” The atheist replied. When it’s about evening, they reached a small village and then searched for a place to stay. But unfortunately there are no vacant places. So they decided to continue to the village outskirt and sleep there.

The atheist said cynically,”God is really good huh!?”. The believer replied, “Maybe for God this is the best place for us to spend the night.”

They set up a small camp under a big tree near the road to the small village. They tied their donkey to a tree several feet from them and when they about to light up their torch, suddenly they hear a loud sound. A beast preyed their donkey and ate it. Those two people climb a tree to get away from it, to stay safe. “You still want to say God is good!?” the atheist complained. The believer replied again,”If that beast didn’t prey the donkey, it surely would prey us. So yes, God is good.”

An hour later or so, they hear the chicken scream. From above they can see, a wild cat preyed their chicken and ate it. This time before the atheist could say anything, the believer said,”That chicken save us, without that chicken, that wild cat already climbed up the tree and attack us. God is good.”. Just after the believer said that, a wind gushes blow out their torch, their heat and light source in the cold night. “It looks like God is really ‘good’ to us this night!” the atheist mad and the believer just stay silence.

The next morning, these two people go back to the small village to stock up. And when they come, they really surprised to see the village. There are houses on fire and wounded people everywhere. The village was robbed by a horde of thieves last night. The believer said, “See, God is good! If our torch still lit up the whole night, the thieves would be able to where we are, and if we didn’t climb the tree then it might be we would be robbed too. So clearly up in the tree with blown out torch is the best for us!”

Most of the times in our life we are like the atheist in the story, whether we realized it or not. We always get mad and blame God or other people when something doesn’t go the way we want it to be. But we forget to see the big picture. Always forget to think that maybe the hardship or bitterness that we experience today can lead us into the best possible way for our life. Maybe those entire things happen for our goodness. It’s true that we can’t see what that goodness is now, but in the future we’ll understand it and when we looked back we will be grateful for what happened to us.

Just like in the story, it’s true they experienced many unpleasant things that night, they lost their stuff, their donkey and chicken, and they have to stay above on tree on cold night, but they’re not harmed at all. Compared what would happen if they able to stay in the village, they might end up wounded or even lost their life.

Let’s learn to be like the believer in the story, see everything from the positive side. Go through every hardship and unpleasant thing patiently and calmly, always believe that there’s a greater purpose for us for everything happen in our life. So don’t be disappointed, broken or even gave up when hardship hit you. Believe there’s goodness waiting for you in the end and that’s will give you strength and courage more than you can imagine to face anything in your life.

Best Regards,

Sleeping Wiseman

Matter of Faith

It’s snowing and the weather started to get cold. Christmas tree and “year-end-sale” sign were everywhere. :D

Few days ago when I was driving I saw a big sign board written “You know Christmas is a myth” made by atheist organization or some kind and not too far away I saw another sign board “You know Christmas is NOT a myth” made by Christian organization. A battle between people with faith and people with faith in this jolly season, a little bit ironic. That made me thought, if those atheists really don’t believe in Christmas, then why they even bother to put a big sign board saying Christmas is a myth? Doesn’t that mean they actually care about Christmas and they still thinking about it inside their heart and mind but they just deny it, pathetic. If they really don’t believe in Christmas then they should have forgotten everything about it, not bring it up again and again.

Yesterday I met my friend and he asked me why I still believe in God and how my faith didn’t waver even though there are many findings – according to him - that show God doesn’t exist. He admitted that he slowly started to lose faith in religion.

Well for me, it’s easy. Every religion in this world offers salvation or at least grant for their believers to go to heaven when they die, which I’m sure everybody already know about this. If you have a good life, have done many good things or at least didn’t do anything really bad, then why waste it by become atheist? I mean, if you become a believer of a religion – any religion – then you will have a chance to go to heaven when you die. It’s true some people argue that heaven don’t exist, but who knows!? Is there any conclusive evidence that prove heaven don’t exist? NO. Then why risk it by being atheist? Because you know, when you die and it turns out that heaven exist, you will regret it for eternity and you can’t do a thing to change it. It will be all too late by then.

It’s not that hard to believe. Choose religion that you think suit you, really clicked with you, then open your heart and turn off your pride. Because your pride is the biggest wall that hinder your heart to believe in most of the cases. Because of their pride people think that they know everything, they are the best and nothing is above them, but they’re wrong. And also turn off your logical sense. There’s no need for logic in believing and faith. Remember to believe and to have faith is with your HEART not with your MIND.

Moreover by committing oneself to a religion will make you better person. There will be people that will remind you when you do something wrong, people that can support you when you’re in hardships and many more. Don’t be stubborn, follow your heart, let people say what they want about you, because you know you’re right and you’ll be the one who laugh in the end.

Best Regards

Sleeping Wiseman

 

Practice What You Preach

Hi, it’s been quite a long time since my last post – as usual, my schedule is full last month. Many people thought that I stopped writing this blog but no. I will not stop writing blog. :)


By the way it’s December now and I can feel the holiday festivities are starting everywhere.



Last month I met friends of my friend. There’s bit of misunderstanding since we’re all new to each other. I like to joke by nature and I do it most of the times, but it seemed these friends of my friend didn’t know it. So it all started when we were in the car and on our way we saw a young man driving really nice car. I was amazed and said wow, that’s cool, I wanna be like that. I said it without any intention, it just spontaneous commentary. Then my new friends suddenly told me that I shouldn’t envy that man and I should be grateful with everything I got and I need to look there are many people who are in worse condition than us. I was speechless at that moment. Then he asked me again what I like the most in this world and I said money in a joking way. Then he and the other friends of my friends lecturing me about greed and evolved pretty much to everything else that happened in the world (corrupted people, economic crisis, etc) all the way until I got home. I was lost of words, they’re so serious. At that time I really thought that they’re a great person judging from the way they talk – or lecture me - about righteousness and humanity.


The next day at work I talked with my friend asking about his friends from yesterday, about their life and something like that. It turned out my friends answers was shocking. My friend told me that his friends from last night were actually as good as I expected. He told me, few months ago his friend company raised several employees wage but unfortunately his friend wasn’t included. Based from his talk last night, he should still be grateful since he still has a job and many people out there were starving right? My friend asked me. But instead of grateful he went to the director office and protested the director because they didn’t raise his wage then the director angry and cut his wage. My friend told me that his friend often gets angry. And there’s still many unpleasant things about him my friend told me.


We often meet people like this in our life. They talks – and sometime criticize – other people really bad then make themselves sound right and better than anybody but in their real life they are actually no better than the people they talk or criticize. And in some case when people talk or criticize them back they will get really angry. What’s with the attitude? They can talk or criticize other people but they don’t want to be talked or criticized themselves. It seemed they think they are they’re perfect.

That’s just not right in my opinion. People should reflect on their own lives before talking or moreover criticizing other people. Don’t just scrutinizing on other people small flaws while they themselves have a lot bigger flaws. It’s shameful and it’s make them look like a hypocrite. What worse are other people will ignore what they say and started gossiping about them behind their back.


Instead of talking and criticizing, what they need to do first is to change their lives become better and set example for other people. For a start they can change themselves first by try to change any lack they could think of themselves. Then ask other people what bad point they see in them and try to change it. Of course it can’t be done overnight, it takes time and perseverance to change yourself. But remember act is louder than words. This way when they advise other people, people will hear them and look up to them. Another thing to think before they talk or criticize other people is they should really learn about that people because, who knows, that people can be a lot better than them. Think before speak, like a saying you better fast in thinking but slow to talk.



If you have something to share, don’t hesitate to use the comments box below. :D

Best Regards,

Sleeping Wiseman

Matter of Spoiling

Few days ago I visited my friend’s house. He told me that he just bought a new car for his son. I was surprised, last month he said to me that he was broke because of his wage had been cut, and now he bought a new car for his son. So I assumed his economic condition is better now and I congratulated him. But then he said that he actually still broke. He bought the car with 5 year credit and he still doesn’t know how he will pay the installment. I was shocked and I asked why then he bought the car if he cannot afford it. He explained to me that his son was mad at him for not having his own car. His son said that he is ashamed to his friend because all of them have their own car. His son even threatened that he will runaway if my friend didn’t buy him a car. So my friend told me he got no choice but to buy the car.

Nowadays we often see thing like that happen. When the kid didn’t get what they want, they started to get mad at their parents by yelling, talking using harsh words or pointing finger at their parents face. This is not right and both the parents and the children are responsible for this to happen.

In my view, children supposed to respect and love their parents because of many factors. First, obviously parents are the one who gave children life. Second parents are the provider for children, they gave love, affection, good house to live in, food to eat and everything they can give to their children, hoping that their children would have a happy and successful life. Third parents are children protectors, they always guard their children and get them off from what they think is dangerous for their children. So what gives the reason for a child to mad at their parent? Nothing. Children need to understand their parents that they also human, they can also make mistakes. Another thing is when parents didn’t give children what they want doesn’t mean that the parents didn’t love the children. The children need to understand that it’s not easy for parents to earn money and their parents’ money is not unlimited. Children also need to learn to be frugal and not over consumptive, so they are not easily taunted by their friends to buy things that they actually don’t need.

On the other side, parents also responsible for this kind of thing to happen. It’s common nowadays for parents buying everything they children want, even when they actually cannot afford it. They think they can make their children happy this way and that way their children will love them more. Well, the parents are wrong. This kind of act will make the children suffer in the future and also there’s probability that they will hate you. I will explain why this can happen.

First, giving everything the children want will only make them spoiled children. This is bad, because they grew up with the mindset that they don’t need to do anything but they still can get everything, this will only make them lazy and weak person. This way the child will not have ambition, competitiveness and aspiration to become better since their life now is already perfect. The other thing is that the children will not used to face hardship because they never need an effort to get what they want. And when they become adult and left their parents, the children will get crushed by the world, they can’t survive. Nobody like spoiled brat. When they face hardship in their life they will give up. Spoiled children usually don’t strive to have a better life since they have no ambition or competitiveness. You can see that many self-made billionaires in this world are from poor family when they were little. Remember parents can show love without spoiling the children. Spoiling will only ruin the children life.

Second, giving everything the children want will only make them think parents as their “money maker” not as someone they should respect and love, and when the children didn’t get what they wanted they will mad and hate their parents, and some children even hate their parents because simple thing like this. Other apparent thing is that over time the children wants will become more and more demanding and uncontrollable.

Third, giving everything children want will turn them as wasteful person. Some parents might think that they have enough money so their children will not need to work in their whole life and that way it’s okay to spoil the children. That’s wrong again. The children that always get anything are usually will grow become over consumptive person. No matter how much money the parents have, the children will spend it like water bursting from tap and soon they will be poor and don’t know how to earn money.

I know some parents think that they have suffered when they were kid and now they want their children to be happy, have a better life than them by spoiling them. But by spoiling the children they actually ruin their child life in the future. The will not be able to stand with their own leg when the parents are gone.

I personally think that parents shouldn’t give anything their children want, instead the parents need to teach the children to save their money to buy thing they want or use reward system, like they need to get good grades or something like that to get the things they want. It’s much better rather than blindly gave them anything they want. The parents need to teach the children how the world works from early age so they can be great people in their life. It’s for their own goodness in and I’m sure they will understand it and grateful in the future that their parents took the right decision.

Be Wise.

Best Regards,

Sleeping Wiseman

 

Matter of Bullying

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101008/ap_on_re_us/us_bullying_one_town

Today I'm gonna talk about bullying, because I concerned with recent news about bullying and I think at some certain point (especially at young age), everybody has experienced / is experiencing / will experience bully, whether became bullier or the one who is being bullied. Recently I read some disturbing news that bullying rate is increasing and even caused students to suicide. For me this is indirect killing and the bulliers are killers. This is very horrifying and also sad on the other side. What's more is that this bullying happened in the school and university, place where people supposed to learn and to be taught knowledge and good morals, so they can be good person in their future life, not become killers. I even read that some schools even turned blindeye to the bullying that happened inside their schools, no wonder now the streets are filled with criminals.

First, people need to learn that everyone is equal status and should not be differentiated because of their race, gender, origin, preference, economy status, skin color, accent, physical status (i.e. disability) or anything else. Everyone is created equal. People usually bully other people because this other people are not the same as them or have something different from them. It can be seen from the cases that are published in the news. Like the girl that are being bullied because her weird accent, or the boy that are gay. Yes it's true they are different, but that doesn't give you the right to judge them and bully them. What's worse is the bulliers usually think themselves are better or superior than the one who being bullied. They're wrong! Both the bulliers and bullied are human, they are the same being and every human is equal, the one who is superior than human is only GOD.

Second, the bulliers need to reflect on themselves. What makes them think they’re right and the one being bullied wrong? Are bulliers are perfect human or sinless human? No. Most of the times bulliers are popular boys or girls in the school and they think they’re great. Yes, maybe at that time you’re great, young, and people like you, but let me tell you, once you got out from university you’re nothing. And who knows that the one who you bullied might become your boss someday and get you back. I’ve seen many bulliers from my time become just regular employees, and when their boss mad at them they can’t do anything, just hanging their head. Or some other bulliers that don’t want to work, they become gangsters and end up in jail or die pointlessly. And at that time you’ll realize you’re not great.

Third, most bulliers think that bullying is cool, funny and it can make other students respect them. It’s really stupid. They don’t realize that they actually ruining someone else life and killing them and it’s ridiculous they’re taking it easy. As you can see in the first story in the news link above, the bulliers are actually laughing when they see the dead body of person they bullied. I’m speechless. They actually the one who killed it and they laugh. Where’s their moral? For me, I see them as cold heartless killer. They should be ashamed. Let me tell you ruining people’s life and killing them is not cool, believe it or not you’ll get the payback in the future, in the times you don’t really expect.

Fourth, I want the bulliers think what if it's like to be the one who are being bullied. The bulliers need to feel what's it's like to be on the shoes of the one who is being bullied. Do they want to be treated or bullied like that if they were them? If they answer no, then why do it to other people. "Do to other people as you want them do unto you" that's the golden rule. And what's more, most of the bulliers actually weaker, insecure and more susceptible than the one who are being bullied, and they didn't realize it, until they get bullied by other people. So please, before bully other people, think what if you're the one in their position.

 

So I have few tips for people who are being bullied :

1. Whatever they do to you, you should keep happy! Just ignore them. I know it’s hard, but if you sad, crying, fear, or scared it’s only make them happy. If you ignore them, eventually they’ll get bored with you and leave you. Remember, just keep happy even they’re throwing food at your face or spit you, as long you are not harmed, ignore it, and keep a smile on your face.

2. Make friends with other people who are being bullied, the more people the better. Because if things get to rough you can fight them back or at last your friends can call the teacher or the one in charge to help you and protect you.

3. Tell people or institution in charge that you’re being bullied. The first one should be your schools and parents, because they’re the one who are close to you. Second, if you live in US you can visit stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov, if you live in other country you can seek institution like this or go to the police if things get worse, they’ll help you. Third, you can seek help to your religion place, like church, I’m sure they’ll help you. And don’t be shy to tell them why people bullied you, it’s better for you to live than die pointlessly and make people who really love you sad.

4. DON’T EVER THINK DEATH IS THE WAY OUT! Whatever happened, don’t think to kill yourself. Live is better than die. Just hang on with the bullying, once you’re out from high school or university, you’re free! Think what the future has in store for you, maybe you’ll be able to reach your dream.

5. ALWAYS THINK OF YOUR DREAM OR LOVED ONE. Just focus on that, tell yourself you will endure this for the sake of your dream or loved one. This will give you extra strength and courage.

6. Don’t let hatred and vengeance stay in your heart. Because you’ll become like them if you keep hatred and vengeance in your heart and you’ll never find happiness in your life. Learn to forgive and mercy.

7. The last and yet the most important. Don’t forget to PRAY. No matter what your religion is, PRAY to your GOD. I’m sure your God never leave you and always be there to help you if you pray.

2 Thessalonians 1:6-7a

⁶God is just: He will pay back trouble to those who trouble you ⁷and give relief to you who are troubled, and to us as well.

 

I hope my writings help you. And I really do hope you can share this writing with bulliers or people that being bullied, to change their live, help them and make them better.

As usual, you can share your experience or anything in the comment section below.

Oh and I just put a new widget in my blog for twitter. I hope you can follow me. :D

Let’s make this world a better place to live, together we can do it.

Best Regards

Sleeping Wiseman

It's Fall season now!!

It’s October and it’s fall season now. There is one thing that I love from fall season that is the fall foliage, seeing the trees turn into yellowish orange and red color and then falling to the ground. It’s such beautiful scenery. I hope all of you can enjoy it as much as I enjoyed it.

During my trip in Alaska, I learned many interesting thing. When I first arrived, my guide told me that people in Alaska only enjoy 3 month of summer and the rest of the year is winter, where the cities would be covered by snow and the temperature drop. And usually businesses are only running at summer, so in winter the activity is really low. What came to my mind is how people can live here and why do they live here, isn’t better for them just move to better place? Then I started to ask those questions to some local people in every city that I visited in my trip.

Their answer to my question is amazed me. Everyone that I asked answered that they’re happy with their life. They said they already live there for their whole life. They have everything their need and they used to it. And some of them answered they’re lucky because they can enjoy nature and wildlife everyday. They also told me that in winter they usually do some small activity for local people or just gathering in someone house having a drink and tell story. I was really amazed on how they live their life there. They enjoyed it even though there are no shopping centers, no supermarkets, no electronic stores, no fast foods joint, no cinemas, etc. Alaska is only one example, because I know that there are many places in this world that’s just like this or worse, but people managed to still live there happily.

Now come to think of it, I’m thinking that people who live in the city should be much happier with their life, since they have all kind of convenient in their life and not to mention better weather. But in fact, many people who live in the city don’t happy with their life. I often see stress people in the city, people mad about some trivial things, like caught in a traffic jam and people starts cursing, whining, throwing tantrum. So what’s wrong? Is the city not good enough? No.

The matter is people are too busy looking and scrutiny at the negative things and can’t see the good things in life. People need to look at the positive points. Why people who don’t have kind of conveniences like we do can be happy and we can’t? It’s all about one’s life view. Happiness and self content is what you create by yourself. I learned from this that even if you don’t have anything if you can think positive and self-satisfied, you can be happy. We should be grateful that we have so many conveniences within our reach. One more thing is that we should be grateful that we live in a place where the weather is good, where we can experience all things just in the right amount, not too long and not too short.

If you have experience or comment, just click the comment button below. :D

And please share this blog site with other people; you can use the share button provided below.

Best Regards

SleepingWiseman

 

Matter of Doing Good Things

Hi, I’m still alive here (some emails asked me if I was dead). It’s been quite a long time since the last time I posted my last blog and I’m very sorry for the late reply for all people who emailed me. I was on vacation with my friends to Alaska and Canada for the last 4 weeks, escaping from the daily life in concrete jungle to enjoy the gift of mother nature. And I’m very grateful that I saw many things that give me inspiration for the future blogs. :D

While I was on my trip, my friends asked me some questions that made me wondering. Some of their questions that made me really wonder were what do I get from doing good thing for other people that I even don’t know? Isn’t this just a waste of time? Don’t I know that whatever I do I cannot change the world become a better place? And why I don’t just write a book or open a consultation place to get extra income, because that would make good thing that I do more worth to do. These questions made me really wonder because is this what most people think or considered before they do good act to other people, that they will good thing if they will get some kind of good payback or profit or money?

Just like I answered to my friends, I want other people know that in my view (Everybody has different view to this and nobody is right or wrong, it’s just a matter of personal sense) doing good thing is definitely not a waste of time, instead it’s the best thing for people to do in their free time rather than like what my friends like to do in their free time like sleeping, or playing some computer games or some other unproductive things which for me that’s the real waste of time.

And what do I get from doing good thing? Nothing if it counts from the material things. But for me, after doing good things I always get a happy feeling like a feeling when people winning a game, sense of accomplishment and also doing good thing can calm and soothe my mind, set back the stress that I got from job or from other bad things happened around me and also give me more confidence. I also asked my friends if they feel the same thing after doing good thing voluntarily, like helping others with their work or some other good things, and they say yes. So basically most people feel happy when doing good things voluntarily, it’s just whether they pay attention to it or not, or whether they decide to kill that feeling or not. And I read some research in the past show that doing good things can make people appear younger, I don’t know if this true or not, but just think this as a bonus if this true. So try doing some good things and prove it yourself. :D

My friends also told me that I cannot change this world no matter what I do because this world is already too corrupted and hopeless. I said to my friend that I don’t try to change this world. I just want to try to make the world a better place to live by doing good things. And this can’t happen if all people are like my friends who thought that the world is hopeless so they choose to not do anything to improve it. You will not know the result before you try it and if you don't start it then who will. No matter how small or rarely people do good things, it will still improve the world. Think about my personal experience, there was a time in the past when I face hard time and there was a person there helping me out, and I was inspired by that person kindness so I do to other people good things too. But that person maybe not even remembered or knows me, but what he did really inspired me. So, good deed is like a disease, it spreads, you maybe think that your good deed that you did today is a small thing for you, but for the people that you helped it might be a huge blessing and made you their inspiration to do good things to other people. The same goes for bad deed too, it spreads, the simple example is bullying, junior got bullied by senior, and when the junior become senior they bully the new junior, it becomes neverend circle. This happen because human naturally have “do what other people do unto you” mindset whether they realized or not. So do good things, to make other do good things too and in the end it will make this world a better place to live. :)

And the last question that was mindboggling for me was why don’t I wrote a book or open a consultation service to get extra income. I said to my friend, why on earth I would do that, my aim is to help people and for personal sense of happiness not for money. Many people who said that they love to help and do good things publicly, but when you in need and come to them, they charged you with money for their help or advices. For me, their purpose is not really to help people but to get money. When you really want to help other people, do it with wholeheartedly and voluntarily, don’t expect anything in return especially money, that’s what I really called helping.

So don’t hesitate to do some good things when you have time. It’s not a matter of how small or big or how many good things you’ve done, but the will and pure intention to do the good things is what matter the most.

I hope my friends’ questions and my answer to their questions can become a reflection for all of us.

And also, if you have any experience how good it feels doing good things, please don’t hesitate to share it in the comment section below. ;D

Best Regards,

Sleeping Wiseman

The world is not all about “Me”

It’s been a while since the last time I posted my blog, because I have a lot of work to do recently. And also I want to say my condolence to the victims of disasters around the world, like flood in Pakistan, earthquakes in China, and many other places, may the victims given patience and endurance to face all of those things.

I also want to introduce a new feature in my blogger, now I’ve provided music player in the right column, so you can hear some music while reading my blog, and I choose soft or slow music so it will not distract your reading. ;D

I often see little kids that act so selfish, childish or insensitive, they don’t think what the condition and situation around them, they want to get all the attention, and when they don’t get or when something don’t go the way they like, they will be angry or crying. Usually, I see it happens when they want to buy a toy and because of something the parents can buy it for them (for example: the parents don’t have enough money) and the kid will hold on to the toy and crying all the way in the department store and ask their parents to buy it, and they don’t understand and don’t want to know why their parent can buy it for them. But hey, it’s normal for kids to do that, and in fact its’ what make them cute, funny and loveable when we tease them.

But what happen if those kinds of habits are carried on up till the adult life? I meet many people in my life and there is always at least one person that is selfish like a kid, whether it’s in high school, university, workplace, family, etc. And when adult people acting so selfish, childish and insensitive like this it’s really annoying and not cute nor lovable at all.

I often see people that only think of pleasing themselves, and don’t care other person condition or what the other person is going through. And most of the times they don’t realize it that their behavior is very rude and annoying until other people dare or care enough to say it directly to them. for example I saw a couple few days ago in a restaurant arguing about the bill, the man asked the woman for them to split the bill into 2 so each of them pay the same amount, then the woman didn’t want to pay because usually the man is the one who paid the bill all this time, but then the man explained that this time he had financial problem because of his work and he need to save it for something, then the woman appeared very angry and yelled something, the she said it’s over and she went out, and the man looked very depressed. I was quite surprised at that time, not by the breaking up, but rather caused by the insensitiveness and childishness of that person. Just because her date was having financial problem and couldn’t pay the dinner she broke up with him. I just wondering didn’t she realize that we are in the middle of financial crisis, and moreover didn’t she think about her date feeling? Even only as a spectator I’m quite annoyed.

Other example that I often see is a boss who is selfish and never thought of their employees. Usually when things don’t go the right way, they start throwing tantrum or harsh words to their employees. Or the most extreme example of selfish is when a person suicide because of simple matters like because they got rejected by their date or because of financial problems. Don’t they think about people who cared about them, or people who depend their life on them and what the burden that he/she give to people around them, who cared and loved them.

People like that need to be reminded or told that their habit is annoying, because as I said, they often didn’t realized that their habit is actually bad and annoying. It’s also for their own goodness and other people. People like this need to learn tolerance and sense of sensitivity, because it’s what we need to have a good social live, to interact with other people. Tolerance is very important in our life, when we tolerate, we also learn to forgive and learn self-control, understanding other people, walk in other people shoes. That’s why people who have experienced many hardships in their life tend to have higher degree of tolerance, that’s because they already felt it before. And those people who are selfish, childish and insensitive usually never really face any hardship in their life.

So please tell and remind everyone you know who are childish, selfish and insensitive to change their habit. And remember their habit can’t change in one night, change needs time, and so keep remind and tell them all the time to change their habit.

If you have any experience with people like this, please share in the comments section.

And also please share my blog using the share button provided below if you find it useful. :D

Let’s make world a better place to live.

Best Regards,

Sleeping Wiseman

 

Move on, go forward!!!

I’ve seen a lot of people who spent their time crying, or lamenting, or sulking, or contemplating, or protesting because of what happened to them. Some of them because of losing job, financial problem, and some other because of their loved one die or they just break up, or some other just plain doesn’t satisfy with their life. And eventually some of their friend will tell them to become an optimist person, see the glass with half water in it as half full not half empty. But for me, screw on how they look that glass, rather than telling them to look the glass as half full, I’d told them to get up and fill up that glass until it’s full!

When people get hit by something hard they usually tend to do nothing or even do something negative and useless. They need someone to tell them, to refresh their mind, that crying or lamenting or protesting will not get them anywhere, especially in the case of the death of someone important for them or losing their job, because those acts will not bring the dead to life again or get them back their last job.

They should do something positive, move on with their life, because life and time are very precious so don’t waste it. And I’m sure your loved one, your family and all of good people around you will want you to move on and go forward. Don’t ever give up because of something bad hit you, when you are knocked down, get up and go forward again, no matter how many times it is.

You know what’s better? Try to make that bad experience as a motivation or inspiration for your life to move forward. For example if you lose all of your money, make it a motivation that you will become richer than before and do anything you could, rather than sit and doing nothing but lamenting. Or you can see real example like people whose loved one died because of cancer and they create an organization or make a move to fight cancer so other people will not experience the same loss as them.

Use your life to the fullest as long as you’re still alive, because I’m sure all of us don’t want to find ourselves regretting for what we didn’t do when we have the chance to do it. And remember many great people have experienced heavy blow in their life and yet they can get up and become great people that advancing the world as we know today.

Always get up no matter how many times you’ve been knocked down, and use that as motivation and inspiration to move on, go forward.

Best Regards

Sleeping Wiseman

 

Branded Stuffs???

Nowadays people, especially who live in big cities, like to buy branded stuffs. Women usually like to buy branded fashion, like clothes, bags, etc. And men usually like to buy gadgets and cars. Most of them think that branded can raise their social status, make them look better, cooler and richer.

Last week I notice my woman work friend brought another new branded bag from famous designer, that day when we chatted, she told me that her new bag price was more than $1500. Of course at that moment I was shocked, not because the price, but rather because her financial condition. Considering she doesn’t have her own house, and still rent an apartment. Moreover she bought it on credit, so she needs to pay the installment every month. And I notice that there are a lot of people who like to buy branded stuff when their financial condition doesn’t allow them or when they simply can’t afford it. Even some of them goes as far as renting those expensive stuffs because they really really can’t afford it.

The question is, is it really worth it to buy branded stuffs or other stuffs that you don’t need when you can’t really afford it?

Let’s look from other point of view. It’s true that branded stuffs can make them happy for this moment, and also they will look like a rich people, but will those branded stuffs can help you through your future or help you when you have hard times? NO. When the hard times come, those branded stuffs cannot do anything to help you. And when you think you want to sell it, those branded stuffs like fashion, gadgets, cars, second hand price is far below from the new price and declining as the time goes, moreover branded stuffs like that always change models in short time and when new model comes out, the old one price is freefalling.

Second, Can branded stuffs give happiness in the long run? NO. For example my friend above, she use most of his money to buy branded stuffs and she still doesn’t have house. What will happen when she keeps going on like this, and in the future when she can’t work anymore or get laid off, because we don’t know what’s waiting for us in the future, and she still doesn’t have a place to live. I’m sure that she and everyone will not happy when we don’t have a place to live. And I think when she keeps buying stuffs like that; she will have a huge debt waiting for her in the future. Living a live full of debt is not a happy life. So people need to prioritize what they need the most for the long run happiness.

Third, can people look up to a person who doesn’t use branded stuffs? YES. People will appreciate you as long you dressed neat, nice and chic, no need for branded stuffs. And moreover many rich people and celebrities who like to dress casually, not using branded stuffs, and people still look up to them, because they know who they really are.

What makes people appreciated by other people is actually their personality not their stuffs. Friends that people get when they use branded stuffs is not true friend, they only interested in your stuffs, not you as a person. When you don’t have anything, they will leave you.

For illustration, when you cover garbage with gold, that’s still garbage inside it when you remove the gold, it cannot be changed, but if gold covered by garbage, it’s still gold inside it.

So think about this, and choose wisely. Your life and your future are in your own hand. ;D 

Best Regards

Sleeping Wiseman